Physics of mall rat

A new breed of rats have taken over the city or rather country these days....the human species has evolved into a degenerated evolution of mall rats..name courtesy some hollywood flick i saw as a teenager, when the word mall was akin to some meteorite rock from space. You guys must be thinking that i am from Fred flintsone's age, but say whatever mall was an alien word like Jackass show is to my dadiji these days.

Anyway i think our nuclear tests is to be blamed for our recently mutated gene's , the tendency to to gravitate towards the local mall needs to be examined by Physicist's because a new law needs to be defined. The relationship between a man and a mall is somthing akin to the newton's law of physics i.e the second most powerful law it goes like this, "The relationship between an object's mass m, its acceleration a, and the applied force F is F = ma. "

I've broken down the formula here to make it simpler for myself and you guys..

Object mass = Money in my wallet/Balance in my credit card or my boyfriends card ;)

Acceleration = Velocity of urgency (that urge can be to own those Ritu Kumar's spring collection or that rucksack from Giordano or woh fabindia ka awesome kurta)

ps: The velocity of urgency directly co-relates to stars in the eyes and a constantly drooling mouth added to it someone who's got money accompanying you.

Force = now this is outcome of both mass and acceleration (we all know the result is equal to the acquisition of the much sought after object)

So the physics part of the mall rat is gotten over with...but this is the first type called Alpha Mall Rat, there are several sub species which i will classify in my next post.

Woo a man

Hey first of all i'd like to thank all the boys who contributed to my nonsensical questionaire with great patience and cursing me under their breath for agreeing to be a part of it. A great deal of research of around 4 hours has gone into this, not to mention the endless assault on my dear ol' keyboard.

Lets get into my subject matter now after the credits to the gladiators which are already given above shall not be mentioned again!!

Well they were all given questions about what qualities of a women they are attracted to physically as well as psychologically. The answers ranged from her face spiralling down towards oh so obvious butt. Intresting inputs came when it came to the other aspects of her personality feminine grace or whatever it's called (Matahari type) that meant was from one guy. Another one was like he wanted a nurturer who could take care of his mood swings like a tree standing tall in katrina like situation. If he wants it to stand at all . One was looking out for intelligence without ego, he's forgotten that it's an extinct combination these days, having it would be like Dodo's walking on the earth again.

Asking them about these questions made me feel like a Scientist observing the lab rats mating rituals as if it were answer to the North korea's nuke experiment in the world peace context, or whatever it means.

Reactions ranged from why maim me for life to you crazy me crazier too!! But it was fun knowing in what made the guys look for in a girl afterall.

Mutiny in my mouth

Second in part of unfortunate series..well now the title is certainly a rip off of Mister Lemony Snicket...anyways lets go on with the blog shall we...

Anyone of you who suffer from cavities would certainly sympathize with me here. I consider myself as a victim of the modern day concentration camp run by the likes of men welding the savage drill. First of all i never would have developed a sweet tooth had i known what kind of repercussions i'd have to face in the future. Nay, ofcourse it was too late when i realised that one can certainly break a bone or two in their body than to get the cavities fixed.

To top it all i have a wisdom tooth which has sprouted out of my gums sideways..ie it's in a sleeping position...a haven for tooth bacteria to prepare ground for a murderous assault. A visit to the dentist confirmed that it needed extraction, as had happened earlier like all his counterparts who had staged mutiny in my mouth, this one too wanted his share of the kill. How can something from your own body rebel against you and win the war on you by siding with your most feared enemy?? why me ??

Had i not had enough tortorous sessions , each one bad enough to kill me. A visit to the dentist apart from blowing a big hole in your pocket and teeth, makes one feel like a moron with cotton stuffed inside the mouth, a look which Marlon Brando adopted and became famous as The Godfather.

Brando aside the fate of my tooth has not been decided yet. As i wait to get over my "Dentistophobia", there are some reports about people with similar fate as mine getting martyred in their mission.

Meanwhile here's something i found out about their patron saint..
The patron saint of dentists is Saint Apollonia, martyred in Alexandria by having all her teeth violently extracted.

And another fact about.... Dental phobia is the serious, often paralyzing fear of seeking dental care. It has been reliably reported that 50% of the American population does not seek regular dental care. An estimated 9-15% of all Americans avoid much needed care due to anxiety and fear surrounding the dental experience. This translates to some 30 - 40 million people so afraid of dental treatment that they avoid it altogether.

May my teeth rest in peace.

I thought It WaS a RARE FIND

2 AM at night...coming out from the loo..i noticed a white roach...gawd!! i thought...what a rare find! Me's going to be famous..very soon.

After all imagining every possible form of acknowledgement...i rushed for my cell...that was the only thing that came to my mind after my thoughts stopped rolling , in every possible direction.

Meanwhile my prized roach was still there...not moving, must have read my thoughts, it probably was waitin for it's 5 mins of glory in the annals of fame n fortune..through me. After snapping it's picture..surprise surprise ..it's didn't move an inch roaches r known to scot away as soon as they sense humans..Even Paris Hilton was not a competition for this one.

Next day before claiming my pie of fame i googled about white roaches...poof..slam...dunk..boing...............

Here's what i found ....
No, it's not an albino. If you see a white cockroach, it has just shed its skin.A cockroach that has just shed its skin is white with black eyes.

Though i still managed to make it famous on this blog.